Being oblivious

freakypumpkin:

There are a lot of posts joking about how Alec doesn’t get Magnus’ advances and how he still finds him ‘cryptic’ after Magnus has stated clear interest in him, in the eyes of the audience at least. 
And this is not meant as judgement for those jokes. I like them as well, I think Alec being oblivious to things like innuendos or flirting is a very charming part of his character.

But with all the joking aside, I’d like to bring up the thought that sometimes people want others to be clear with them. That sometimes hints, while maybe clear to a third party, are not as clear or clear enough to the person they are directed at. And maybe sometimes while being clear to said person, said person does want it to be spelled out for them, might even need it to believe it.

People are being flirted with as a joke or played with otherwise. 

So, it can be very important to people with low self-esteem in relationship-matters to have things spelled out for them. They need a clear message more than hints to go on because with hints there’s always the option for the one making them, to have a backdoor, to tell them that they ‘misinterpreted things’. 
That’s a very scary situation. 
And it can be almost a healing experience to have somebody tell you upfront that they like you without treating you as an idiot for not ‘getting the hints’. For some people it might even go as far that they ignore mere hints because they think as long as they are just hints, the other person isn’t seriously interested. 

So, I don’t know. The thought just came back to me with seeing the posts about Alec (and again, it’s not a judgement of those, they just acted as an reminder). 

It’s not specifically about Alec either, it’s just a matter that’s very important to me and often at the back of my mind when it comes to that character.