Tag: fml

HOW THE SIGNS RESPOND TO I LOVE YOU

Aries: I knew it
Taurus: *screams on the inside* really?
Gemini: Noooooooo haha
Cancer: Why would anyone love me
Leo: We have so much in common!
Virgo: No thank you.
Libra: ….gtg!
Scorpio: No bye
Sagittarius: ????
Capricorn: What does that even mean why would you say that
Aquarius: How much did my mom pay you to say that to me
Pisces: Cool!!!!

snorlaxatives:

people are always like “respect your elders” and i’m just like….. no….. i’ll respect everyone until they give me a reason not to. i’ll respect people who respect me. i have no obligation to respect someone just because they’re older than me. and from my experiences, old people are rude as fuck and have some bizarre superiority complex

signs at their best vs. at their worst

Aries at their best: “I love you my life is amazing I love everyone. hugs for all.”
Aries at their worst: “I hate my life I hate you let’s kill everyone.”
Taurus at their best: “Let’s have a giant cuddle puddle with everyone I love people”
Taurus at their worst: *eats the entire refrigerator including the metal* “My life is over”
Gemini at their best: “wow I’m fabulous. do you see how perfect I am? I’m the new Beyoncé”
Gemini at their worst: “you know I could kill you?”
Cancer at their best: “has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are? wow can I be you? I love you. I love you all” *blows kisses and throws flowers everywhere*
Cancer at their worst: “I RULE THIS FUCKING WORLD BACK OFF AND DONT FUCKING TELL ME WHAT TO DO”
Leo at their best: “wow I’m so perfect I’m beautiful.”
Leo at their worst: “MY LIFE SUCKS. DO YOU REALIZE HOW MUCH MY LIFE SUCKS?”
Virgo at their best: *feminist rant* “I love everyone wow”
Virgo at their worst: “actually I hate you all. now I need to go clean my fucking room and cry”
Libra at their best: *signs entire musical soundtrack*
Libra at their worst: “nobody loves me. you don’t love me. he doesn’t love me. my mum doesn’t love me. my cat doesn’t love me. my goldfish doesn’t even love me.”
Scorpio at their best: “I’m a fucking goddess my life is perfect”
Scorpio at their worst: “I hate myself my life is over”
Sagittarius at their best: “heheheheh” *does something stupid* “wow I’m HILARIOUS”
Sagittarius at their worst: *kills you and drinks your blood*
Capricorn at their best: “I hate all of you” *evil smile*
Capricorn at their worst: “I hate all of you” *emotional breakdown and sobs for the next year*
Aquarius at their best: “unicorns are real dude I swear. everyone is so beautiful. can I paint you? you’re gorgeous and so am I!”
Aquarius at their worst: *sobs* “I hate earth. that’s it, I’m moving to Mars”
Pisces at their best: “I’m so cute. so kawaii. wow I’m an angel and so are you. hehe”
Pisces at their worst: “murder”

booksmart or streetsmart?

aries: reads books about becoming streetsmart
taurus: streetsmart because they forget what they read
gemini: probably reads books on the street
cancer: streetsmart because they dont read any smart books
leo: streetsmart wishing they were booksmart
virgo: uses booksmarts on the streets
libra: pretend to be booksmart by listening to others who are booksmart
scorpio: booksmart with just the right stuff about the streetlife
sagittarius: booksmart, completely lost in the streets
capricorn: could be really streetsmart but choses to become booksmart because they think its more prestigous
aquarius: booksmart, pretending to be streetsmart
pisces: streetsmart and booksmart but dont know how to use either