fml – Page 5 – lanablack

peachdoxie:

pozolegirl:

zedrin-maybe:

siebewastaken:

This is probably obvious to most but man:

When you’re going to randomly message someone you’re not close with, make sure you have something to talk about.

Don’t just go “hi, what’s up”, and expect a good conversation to happen.

I’ma reblog this again cause the comments in here are ridiculous to the point of being comedy.

People are acting like the only two ways to start a conversation is an empty “Hi, sup?” and posting an entire 8 paragraph communist manifesto.

Like, if you’re messaging someone you don’t know, is it really that hard to have a conversation topic in mind before doing so? If not, why do you feel the need to message that person in particular considering you’re not close to them?

If it’s someone you venerate (e.g. a popular artist or something), instead of asking them a ‘hi, sup’ that they probably get at LEAST once daily from strangers, try asking about something of theirs that genuinely interests you, or something you think they’d be interested in, or talk about something they did that you liked or thought was funny. Or ask them for their thoughts on something that concerns you particularly. These are all things that wind up involving both parties.

Don’t initialize a conversation with someone you don’t know then dump the full responsibility of continuing it on them. I don’t think a lot of reblogs complaining about anxiety understand the irony here–if you feel you’re not good at conversing, consider the person you’re talking to might also feel that way about themselves. Even if the person you’re talking to doesn’t get anxious at suddenly having to hold up a conversation, you’re banking on them having something to talk about right then and there. Most the time that’s going to be a pretty boring conversation. If you’re the one making contact, you at least have the advantage of choosing how the conversation starts.

Uh…. This happens to me a lot. And I’m very flattered and happy to talk to people, but when conversations are started like this and then later the people are like: “Wow this isn’t a very good conversation.” it makes me feel really nervous and bad because like, well it wasn’t my idea to have this conversation, if we were saying something besides ‘Hey.’ “Hi” then maybe I could contribute but uuuugh…. I just feel like I’m failing when I have no right to feel that way because I don’t actually owe them a conversation, it’s just me being kind and taking time to respond and talk to people!

I feel anxious when people message me things like this because I feel like I HAVE to reply back with something interesting when I honestly have no idea what to say, because I have no idea who you are!

I really do like to talk to people. I really do!

If we’ve been talking for awhile and then you message me this then I don’t really mind because I’ve talked to you and I know you and how to talk to you. But if it’s just out of the blue for the first time and you don’t have a question or something else to follow up with your ‘hello’, I feel like a lot of the weight has been shoved onto me to carry the conversation, and I feel like I really can’t do that when I know nothing about you. D:

I want to have nice conversations with you.

I honestly do. I have so much fun talking to people. I just need something to talk about.

This post does a very good job of explaining an issue I’ve had with several posts I’ve seen on this website that I couldn’t quite place why I was put off by them. They’re those posts that are like “If you want to start a conversation with me, just come talk to me! Even if we’ve never spoken before it’s okay! Just say hi!” Which is a perfectly fine sentiment, but since reaching a decent level of popularity in various fandoms, I’m hesitant to reblog those posts.

Now, I realize, it’s because I would be opening up the way for people to come “just say hi!” to me, which is really awkward because heck, I don’t really know why someone is saying hi or where to go with this conversation when it’s just someone I’ve seen occasionally liking my posts or whatever. The onus then falls to me to carry a conversation that I didn’t ask for in the first place. No offense intended to anyone who has done this, since it’s not really a thing that’s taught to people, but receiving a message that has very little content from a total stranger is, while flattering, frankly frustrating and annoying, not to mention awkward for me.

It’s honestly easier to respond to a message that has just the word “brick” than “Hi :D” because at least then I can ask a question or respond with a picture of a brick. Be creative with your conversation starters! It’s honestly much easier and more refreshing to deal with than just a plain “Hello!”