midshipmank:

APPARENTLY ALEC IS SUPER SHIPPABLE??????????

HOW???????????

YES HE’S ADORABLE AND PERFECT AND I LOVE HIM ENDLESSLY BUT I PHYSICALLY CANNOT READ/HEAR ABOUT ANYTHING BEYOND MALEC OKAY. HE CAN KISS SOMEONE ELSE AND I WILL DIE INSIDE WITH HIM BECAUSE IT IS NOT MAGNUS AND IT WILL NEVER BE MAGNUS.

I’M NOT SAYING DON’T GO WRITE YOU JALEC OR SALEC OR SEBALEC OR WHAT EVER THAT IS, I’M JUST SAYING I DON’T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE HOW CAN YOU WHEN MALEC IS SO PERFECT.

AND ALSO WHEN, CANONICALLY, ALEC IS SO IN LOVE WITH MAGNUS HE WOULD NEVER STRAY. AND HE PROBABLY REALLY HATES CHEATING. (I ACTUALLY CAN’T REMEMBER IF HE KNOWS ABOUT HIS PARENTS, BUT IT JUST SEEMS LIKE A VERY ALEC THING TO HATE.) ALSO, HE’S SO WORRIED ABOUT MAGNUS LEAVING HIM, WHY WOULD HE EVER LOOK BEYOND HIS WARLOCK? HE CHANGED HIS WHOLE LIFE FOR MAGNUS, GAVE EVERYTHING.

BUT IDK MAYBE IT’S JUST FOR THE SEX?

BUT ALAPSKDKAKFK THAT’S STILL REALLY UNAPPEALING TO ME, ESPECIALLY WITH ALEC AND MAGNUS. LIKE AHHH HOW COULD YOU LET SOMEONE ELSE TOUCH THEM THAT WAY.

I’VE READ MAGNUS WITH OTHER PEOPLE JUST BECAUSE OF CANON, BUT IT’S ALWAYS LEFT ME ANGRY/JEALOUS/DEPRESSED/REALLY REALLY UPSET.

BECAUSE, LET’S FACE IT, I HAVE OVER-IDENTIFICATION ISSUES.

WITH ALEC.

SO YES DEFINITELY ANGRY AND JEALOUS. LIKE WITH IMASU AND KITTY IN PERU? I WAS SEETHING FOR HOURS. I HAD TO GO BACK AND REREAD SCENES LIKE “YOU ARE NOT TRIVIAL” AND THE ACCORDS HALL AND OH ALL THOSE LITTLE TIDBITS WE GET, OVER AND OVER. I HAD TO REMIND MYSELF, OVER AND OVER, THAT IT WAS ALEC MAGNUS WAS GOING TO BECOME MORTAL FOR.

AND ON TOP OF SEVERE OVER-IDENTIFICATION WITH ALEC LIGHTWOOD, I KNOW THAT I REALLY COULDN’T CARE LESS ABOUT A LOT OF THE TMI CHARACTERS.

NOW, THAT WILL PROBABLY CHANGE. I HAD THE SAME SENTIMENTS GOING INTO CLOCKWORK PRINCESS AND I SOBBED FOR THE LAST 80 PAGES STRAIGHT I KID YOU NOT AND IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH MAGNUS, WHO WAS THE ONLY CHARACTER I’D DEEMED WORTHY, AND THE ENTIRE REASON I READ THE BOOK.

I’VE ALSO NOT ALWAYS FELT THIS WAY. I USED TO ADORE JACE AND CLARY AND SIMON, BUT NOW I CARE PRETTY MUCH ONLY FOR MAGNUS AND ALEC. AND SOMETIMES IZZY BECAUSE SHE LOVES HER BROTHER (ALEC). I’M TRYING TO REMEMBER THAT JACE ALSO REALLY CARES ABOUT ALEC, BUT HONESTLY HE HAS OVERLOOKED ALEC SO MANY TIMES IN FAVOR OF CLARY THAT I JUST CAN’T. MY PROBLEM WITH HIM IS ACTUALLY KIND OF RIDICULOUS, SEEING AS ALEC IS SUPER TOUCHY ABOUT THIS SUBJECT. MY PROBLEM? HE’S NOT WILL. AND TO ME, ALEC IS MORE THAN WORTH THE LOVE JEM AND WILL HAVE FOR EACH OTHER, BUT JACE JUST DOESN’T FULFILL THAT.

IF I GO ON, IT WILL SOON BECOME APPARENT THAT ALL MY ISSUES CENTER AROUND ONE ALEC LIGHTWOOD.

I JUST HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS OKAY.

HE’S BASICALLY ME, BUT A GUY. AND I GUESS I DIDN’T HAVE AS MANY PROBLEMS WITH MY SEXUAL ORIENTATION BECAUSE I PRETTY MUCH ONLY HAVE A ROMANTIC ORIENTATION, BUT THIS IS ABOUT ALEC NOT ME.

LIKE HMM ALEC BITES HIS LIP SO SHOULD I.

ALEC MAKES A BAD DECISION AND GEE WHY ALEC WHY WOULD YOU GO SEE CAMILLE YOU ARE SO STUPID I WOULD DO THE EXACT SAME THING

IF I DIDN’T DO IT FOR LEGOLAS, I’M LEARNING ARCHERY FOR ALEC.

I ALSO LOVE THE NAME ALEXANDER LIKE ISN’T THAT THE MOST PERFECT NAME EVER. (Note: this is also because of the Leviathan character Aleksandar von Hohenburg).

WOW LET ME JUST GET COMBAT BOOTS BECAUSE WOW LOOK AT ALEC’S

SWEATERSWEATERSSWEATERS MOTHSMOTHSMOTHS BLACKBLACKBLACK

ALEC IS JUST MY EVERYTHING OKAY AND MALEC IS MY SOUL AND SURE THERE ARE OTHER THINGS THAT ARE OTHER PARTS OF MY SOUL BUT THIS IS THE UNDERLYING BLANKET OF IT AND CAN YOU NOW UNDERSTAND WHY I FOUND IT SHOCKING AND DISTURBING THAT ALEC IS APPARENTLY SHIPPABLE WITH EVERYONE WHETHER FOR SEX OR FLUFF I DON’T KNOW BUT I JUST CAN’T UNDERSTAND. NO MATTER HOW WELL YOU WRITE IT I JUST WON’T GET IT WHICH IS WHY I DON’T READ IT AND I GUESS I’M JUST ASKING WHY BUT THERE IS LITERALLY NO EXPLANATION YOU COULD GIVE ME THAT I WOULD UNDERSTAND.

AND THAT’S TOTALLY OKAY. YOU CAN TRY IF YOU WANT TO, BUT I DON’T THINK IT WILL WORK. IT’S LIKE HITLER—I WON’T EVER UNDERSTAND HIS REASONING, EVEN IF I MAP IT BACK TO HIS CHILDHOOD, BECAUSE THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO WENT THROUGH WHAT HE DID, AND DIDN’T TURN OUT HOW HE DID, AND EVEN IF I SEE ALL THE REASONS I WON’T EVER FULLY UNDERSTAND THE HATE THAT FILLED HIM. LIKE I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND WHAT OTHERS SEE IN SHIPPING/WRITING ALEC IN ROMANTIC OR SEXUAL RELATIONSHIPS THAT AREN’T WITH MAGNUS, BUT DO WHATEVER YOU WANT. MAYBE HITLER WAS A BAD EXAMPLE. I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE EAT SALAD, I GUESS. IT’S COLD AND SLIMEY. WHY.

AND YES IT IS TWO AM BUT I JUST HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS OKAY.

AND I SLEPT LIKE ALL DAY SO I’M PRETTY AWAKE ACTUALLY.

“ALEC IS MORE THAN WORTH THE LOVE JEM AND WILL HAVE FOR EACH OTHER, BUT JACE JUST DOESN’T FULFILL THAT.”
^ this! I get angry everytime anyone mention Jace & Alec parabatai bonds because honestly, what bonds??? Sometimes I feel like Alec is the only one who cares in this relationship. But I think Simon & Alec are quite cute together, in a friend way.

Really, I can never understand why people ship Jalec. I get that in the first book there are not many Malec moments & Alec were still in love with Jace, but honestly I dislike Jace from the moment he ignored & interrupted Alec when Alec was talking to him in Taki’s. That’s really rude, & you should never do that to your friend (and Alec is not just a friend, he is your parabatai, you are supposed to be closer than brothers, but yet you treated Alec like shit!).

And I always have the feeling that Jace constantly makes Alec feels bad about himself. People said Jace also cares about Alec, that might be true, but Alec is always the one who cares more, & Alec deserve more than that. I guess most people who ship Jalec love Jace, because if you love Alec, then you would realize that Jace doesn’t deserve Alec at all